Damm!!!

Just returned from Ede...
Damm that was a shitty profromance by me.. I weight in at 86kilo's(!) and could not sweat it of in the sauna,only getting my ass to a 84, stil to heavy!
So I fought in the -91 kilo division, a dicision that proved not to be the right one for me before..
I'm rather weak if it comes to pure strenght, and these guys tend to be on my level,but much stronger.. I stil won 3rd place, but I serieusly dont care for 3rd places... And I got Submitted!!! For the first time in Grappling I had to tap...By a god dam north/south power choke..Just brute force and I just could not figure out how to get out of the dam headlock,and when things started to daze..I dicided that it was better to tap out..But shit that made me angry!!
Mostly at myself, I came unprepared to this tournament, and I paid for it.
Very unprofessional...
The other matches I won by RNC, points and I lost an other on points(just on the edge,but a loss is a loss)..Wich pissed me of even more.. A poul of 5 guys, and I win 2 and lose 2..
Thats the score of a biginner..
Wel the positive note is that I know some nice things to work on, and I should focus myself more if I want to win the next one.
Cry in the Dojo, laugh on the battlefield..The last 3 weeks it was the other way around, and i paid for it..